The story of the week is about a Gatineau man who faces eleven days in jail for not registering his cat despite the cat being a stray and the man caring not at all about the cat. With the ongoing implosion of Postmedia, commentators like Bruce Livesy are asking about what stories aren’t being covered as newsrooms shrink. Answer: It’s cat stuff. In the National Post, Andrew Coyne insists newspapers must improve in quality the way TV has. Again: the answer is cat stuff.
The Gatineau Catman story can teach us a lot. For example, instead of Postmedia CEO and Metaphor for Falling Upwards Paul Godfrey saying he’ll take responsibility for the company’s products, he could instead say that the newspapers are simply strays that don’t belong to him. Instead of penning a shrill editorial to his nemesis, the Toronto Star’s evidently bored chairman John Honderich could live by the Tao of the Outaouais SPCA animal control: “You feed it, you own it.” So, Torstar needs to order $800-million worth of lunches for Postmedia’s newsrooms and that constitutes ownership. I am devoting my life to writing the screenplay of an intrepid cat and his man as they fight the nefarious power of lower municipal courts.
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